Another Blog Challenge - Complete!

Today is the last day of July.  And I made it!

What I mean is, that I made it through the Blog Every Day challenge!  (Also known as NaBloPoMo.)  It got a bit sketchy at the end with some family stuff going on, but alas, another summer blog challenge is complete.

I think I'm going to make this a tradition on the blog - complete one daily challenge every summer, whether it's a special one or a NaBloPoMo.  I love the purpose these challenges give, the prompts always make me think, and usually generate some pretty interesting (and sometimes inspiring) posts!

My favorite thing about these blog challenges is meeting new friends, and this month was no exception!  New bloggy buddies, like Judy over at Charming Simplicity, expand my reading repertoire, and make blogging even more fun!

If you'd like to participate in this challenge whenever, all the prompts are posted here.  Thanks for playing along!

Day 31: A Vivid Memory

A vivid memory, eh?  This one happened more than ten years ago, and I still chuckle when I think of it!

I was nannying for a family while the parents were out of town.  I had three kids in my care for ten days.  I'd stayed with this family before, so it was nothing new.  I enjoyed spending time with them, and hey, the kids, a seven year old boy, and girls ages 9, and 11, were in school from 8-3, and had after school activities, so it was kinda easy, actually!

Friday night the girls had a sleep over. Around two o'clock in the morning, the girls flew into my room, completely freaked out, because they heard a noise downstairs.  I assured them all was fine, and told them they could bring their sleeping bags in and sleep in my room.  They got settled in, and this time, we heard the noise again.  They all screamed, and I have to admit, I was kinda scared myself!  A few more LOUD bangs followed, and with my heart pounding as loud as the noises, I crept down the stairs, leaving four pre-teen girls huddled in my bed.

The noise was coming from the kitchen, and with fear coursing through my veins, I tiptoed in, and flipped on the lights. 

There, I found their little brother, sitting in the pantry, eating peanut butter.  I unleashed the fury on him!  At this point, the girls had flown down the stairs and were standing, wide-eyed, in the kitchen door, as I screamed at him.  I think they were more afraid of me than anything at that moment! 

I totally took him by surprise, as he didn't anticipate getting caught.  He tried the "I just wanted some peanut butter!" ploy, but when questioned as to what made peanut butter so loud, he couldn't help but grin, confirming that he'd done it on purpose.  After a good minute of screaming at him, I quickly regained my composure, told him to brush his teeth again before he went back to bed, and sent everyone back up stairs.

What a night it was!

Day 31 Prompt: A vivid memory.

Day 30: Letting Go

Letting go........ two simple words......... so many interpretations......

Ironic that this is today's prompt, as today, I let my grandmother go.  She graced this Earth for more than 90, very, very full years.

Letting go does not mean forgetting.  It does not mean pretending things never happened.  It does not mean that the past is erased.

Letting go means moving forward.  It means picking up the pieces and creating a new picture.  It means growing.  It means forgiving.

As I let go to my grandmother, I will not forget all she has gifted my life with.  I will remember the good, let go of the bad, and forgive the hurts. 

Letting go means so many things.  Let go of the bad to make room for the good.  Let go and let the universe open to you, to the plans it has for you.  Let go, and just be.

Grandma, you will be missed......


Day 30 Prompt: React to this term: Letting Go.

Day 29: Music!

Oh boy.  Another one?  Seriously?  Only five?!  I have an entire page devoted to music!   Picking only five is gonna be tough.  So here's my compromise.  I'm picking five that may or may not be on the list already.  Promise me you'll check out the music page for the rest.... and note that like the quote page, it's an ever growing page, too!

Here we go.... in no particular order, five favorite songs:

Song 1: The Killers - When You Were Young

Song 2: Jimmy Eat World - The Middle

Song 3: Owl City - Fireflies

Song 4: Yes - I've Seen All Good People

Song 5: Wham! - Wake Me Up Before You Go Go

There you have it.  My very eclectic mix of songs.  It took me over two hours to narrow it down to just five!  Not an easy (or fun) task!

Day 29 Prompt: Five songs or pieces of music that speak to you or bring back memories. Use Grooveshark or YouTube to include them in the post.

Day 28: Pictures. Just Pictures

Day 28 Prompt: Only pictures.

Day 27: Dear Readers

Dear Readers, 
Dear Friends,

That sounds better.  You may all be reading this, but those of you that read regularly and have gotten to know me, well, you're friends.  Maybe not in the physical world, but definitely in the cyber world!

I don't know that I've ever said it before, but this is the perfect opportunity to say it: Thank you.  Thank you for reading my words.  Thank you for sharing them and google + ing them and tweeting them.  Even more than that, thank you for sharing YOUR words with me.  Your comments, whether a simple "I can relate." or a more elaborate note, mean the world to me.  I have saved many comments in my email, so that I can quickly pull up the ones that I've found particularly helpful, and re-read them when I need a little extra boost.

I never thought I'd be a blogger.  I never thought I had anything to say, to share, or anything that would be worth reading.  What started nearly two years ago as a project to help with my eating disorder recovery process has blossomed into a blog that I pour my heart into, and am very, very proud of.

The fact that you all read it is icing on the cake.  And your comments?  They are the sprinkles that make it all a bit more sweeter!




Day 27 Prompt: A letter to your readers.

Day 26: Good Read

So for this challenge I, once again, had quite a few options to choose from, and it was a bit tricky to narrow it down.  For once, though, I managed, and picked one of my long-time favorite and inspirational reads.

"Mom, I'm Fat"
I don't remember how I found this article.  I think it was floating around Facebook for a while.  The first time I read it, I cried.  I probably teared up the first few times I re-read it, too.  It's just that good.  At least, for me, it is such a wonderful example of how small moments can really shape a child. 

To be honest, I don't know if, at this point in my life, I'd have the guts to do what the author did.  I have so much frickin' baggage when it comes to body image that I don't know if I'd be able to shove that aside to help my daughter.  I really hope that I would be able to put my own issues aside to potentially prevent my daughter from experiencing some of the same torturous issues that I've faced.

I am so inspired by the way she handles things.  That despite her expertise in the area of girl empowerment, her own child baffles her.  As much as she inwardly struggles, she outwardly does what I think will never be forgotten by her daughter, and hopefully help her daughter move through and avoid any further body image issues.

Great read.  Truly.  Worth saving for your future children....... at least I think so.


Day 26 Prompt: Something you read online. Leave a link and discuss, if you'd like.

Day 25: Hey. You!

"You are wise beyond your years."

I don't remember the first time I heard it, but the first time it stuck, I was in ninth grade.  And stick it did.  Maybe because my English teacher wrote it on nearly every paper I turned in.

At that time, I thought it to be a high, high, compliment, and was very proud to be considered such a wise kid.  Now that I look back on that, I realize that while it was most definitely meant as a compliment.......  being wise beyond your years is not always a good thing.  Cause it meant that I had experienced things that were well beyond my tender young years.  And those experiences were not always good ones, often resulting in lost childhood experiences.

Funny how a few years can completely shift your perspective on a simple comment from a well-meaning and wonderful friend.

Day 25 Prompt: Something someone told you about yourself that you'll never forget (good or bad.)

Day 24: Worst Traits?

Oh goodness.  Only three?  I could come up with a heck of a lot more, and it would be way easier than a list of positive traits, sadly.

First, I am very stubborn, er, determined.  It's not that I'm unwilling, I just need to very clearly understand the how, why, and what before I will agree...... most of the time.

Second, I am extremely hyper-vigilant.  I notice EVERYthing.  I mean everything.  To a fault.  And this gets in the way of a lot.  It is extremely frustrating, and I've yet to find a positive in being hyper-vigilant.

Thirdly, I seem to enjoy living in an internal misery.  I don't know how to enjoy life without worrying about the other shoe dropping.

Other traits?  I could list a dozen easily, but I will, for once, follow the rules of the challenge and stop with three.

Day 24 Prompt: Your top three worst traits.

Day 23: Life Lessons

I like to say that you learn something new every single day.  And it's rarely in school.  Or at least I used to like to say that.  Now that I'm a teacher, I have a modified version of it.  Or, more like, the old adage applies once you hit middle school.  Because in elementary school, you are definitely learning something new every day, IN school, at least in my class!

A few of those things include........

• Kindness is crucial.  Genuine kindness will get you everywhere.  
• People can tell if you're being insincere.
• Patience is more powerful than you can imagine.
• Silence can be your most powerful tool.
• The golden rule really is golden.
• The world doesn't revolve around you, no matter what you may think.
• Things can always get worse.  Things can always get better.
• Perspective is a little thing that makes a very, very big difference.

Day 23 Prompt: Things you've learned that school won't teach you.

Day 22: Stepping on the Soapbox

This is such a timely prompt for me right now!

Two summers I got a great pair of shorts.  As it was near the end of the summer, they were sold out everywhere, even online, otherwise, I'd have bought a few pairs.  Fast forward to this summer.  Back to said store as they brought that style of shorts back!  Yeah!  I was so excited and went straight in to pick up a few pairs.  Lucky me, there was a big sale going on, so the shorts were half-off.  Unlucky me, there was, once again, only one pair in stock that fit me.

(stepping on the soap box)

The pair of shorts I bought two years ago were my semi-typical size.  As I wore them, they stretched a bit (or I lost weight, who knows) and they got to be too big, but still wearable.  The pair of shorts I bought this year were a size LARGER than the previous pair, and are just a smidge tight on me!

What gives?!  Same store.  Same style.  Same shorts.  Totally different fit!  I mean, I'm holding the shorts next to each other, reading the size labels, and they are totally off base!  The larger size short is actually smaller than the smaller size short!  Seriously people, what gives?  Are you trying to add to the already messed up body-image that many women carry with them?    I mean come on.  An eight is an eight is an eight.  At least that's how I think it should be.  Not an eight one summer, which becomes a ten the  next, which becomes a twelve the next, yet all three pairs of shorts are exactly the same.

This frustrates me and if it weren't for two plus years working on recovery, it would really depress me, too.

(stepping off the soapbox)

Day 22 Prompt: Rant about something. Get up on your soapbox and tell us how you really feel. (a pet peeve, a current event, a controversial topic, something your husband or roommate or neighbor or boss does that really ticks you off.)

Day 21: The Archives

Hmmm.... link to my favorite posts in my archives.  That would require actually going back and reading the archives, which I actually haven't done in a while!

So.  Let's see.  I'll try and keep the list short......

1. 11 Things (11.11.11)
2. Farewell 2011 (12.31.11)
3. The A Word (2.12.12)
4. Perspective (5.28.12)
5. Word of the Day: Emotional (6.10.12)
6. Word of the Day: Laughter (6.18.12)
7. Turning Point (8.13.12)
8. Professionally Developed (10.31.12)
9. Stormy Weather (11.13.12)

Well, it isn't exactly short, but....  Those of you curious for a glimpse into more of my story, hopefully this will clear things up a bit!

Day 21 Prompt: A list of links to your favorite posts in your archives.

Day 20: Getting Real

A struggle.  Present day.  Like, something I'm dealing with now.  Working on now.  Kinda goes along with the Day 16 post about difficulties. 

Difficulties.  Life is full of them.  What makes them liveable is how you choose to respond to those difficulties.  And I don't always respond well.

I'm........... a little embarrassed to admit........... how much I'm struggling with this whole idea of growing up.  I mean, I'm in my 30's. 
I'm chronologically an adult.  Except I feel like anything but.  I am so lost in this identity discovery, something kids usually go through as they make their way in and out of adolescence and teenage time and early adulthood.

I'm digging my heels in.  I'm white knuckling it.  I'm resisting.  Because I'm ascared.  I skipped those growing-up experiences the first time through, and while logically I know that the way to "fill those holes" is to let myself go through the experiences now.  But I must have skipped them for a reason, so to re-live something I avoided the first time? 

Let's just say my therapist has her hands full with me these days.  And I'm so, so, so, SO grateful to have her on my team.

Day 20 Prompt: Get real. Share something you're struggling with right now.

Day 19: Five Faves

Had I known this prompt was coming (and technically, I did, I just wasn't paying close enough attention!) I might have been able to select only one blog for the Day 5 prompt!  So in addition to my bloggy buddies I introduced you to in Day 5, here are five more blogs worth checking out (at least in my opinion!)

Blog 1 - Now. Here. Life -- This relatively new blog is quickly becoming a favorite, as I can relate very much to what the author shares.  That, and she's incredibly inspiring with her words, and her photography!  One of my favorite lines on her whole blog is on her About Me page - "I'm a recovering control-freak."  She's not had an easy path in life, which makes her words all the more motivating to read.

Blog 2 - Charming Simplicity -- I only recently met Judi, through July's NaBloPoMo, and charming is definitely a good descriptor of her blog, and of her!  She writes about this and that, smiles, some challenges, beautiful flowers, and life.  And she offers quite a refreshing look at things in the process!

Blog 3 - Tales of a Boundary Ninja -- If you're looking for some psychological wisdom, you're going to want to check out Attachment Girl's blog.  She has so much intellectual and scientific knowledge of this process called therapy that you're bound to learn more than you expect.  That, and she's an awesome writer, and person! 

Blog 4 - I'm Just That Way and That's Just Me -- Not one of my typical blogs, but one of my favorites.  Dani is a "sassy, crafty, mama bird from Los Angeles raising a very sweet little girl with Autism in the Midwest....and stuff" which pretty much says it all.  I'm inspired, motivated, and sometimes a little saddened by all that she has faced with her little bird, yet, I always feel good after reading her blog.

Blog 5 - I am intentionally not listing a five.... cause there are about fifty more I could list, so instead I'll steer you over to my blog roll, where you might find some repeats, or not, but it's an ever-growing list so it will make for a very long-lasting number five!

Day 19 Prompt: Five of your favorite blogs and what you love about them.

Day 18: Childhood

I think I was six or seven the year my parents had the hardwood floors refinished in our house.  I remember it being summer, and a good one at that, as I was going to an awesome day camp that I enjoyed a lot.

The way the house was laid out, having the floors refinished meant the only parts of the house we could access were my parents bedroom, the half-bathroom, the basement, the kitchen, and with a clever bridge that my dad created out of two milk crates and a board, we could access the full bathroom.  Everything else was off limits till the floors were finished.  Thankfully, it was summer, and my parents lack of disposable income led to a bit of creativity.

They created a campsite in the back yard for us.  Being summer, it was pretty fitting, and it was a lot of fun!  For three days we slept in sleeping bags in the tent.  While my mom cooked in the kitchen, we ate on the picnic table next to the tent and enjoyed popsicles and smores for dessert.

Three days of living in a tent were any kid's dream, cause camping meant no bath!  Except, that's where the bridge my dad built came into play.  And to be honest, it's my favorite memory of the whole situation.  It felt quite adventurous climbing across the rickety board, perilously perched atop the waxy milk crates.  It made taking a bath not so bad, at least for those few days!

Day 18 Prompt: Tell a story from your childhood. Dig deep and try to be descriptive about what you remember and how you felt.

Day 17: Me

This post feels a little exposing, as I've never put a picture of me on the blog before....

I actually really like this picture of me, which is rare.  (Both that I like the photo, and that I'm in a photo are rare, actually!)

It was taken on a beautiful spring day, the sky was a brilliant blue.  A nearby playground was beckoning me to come play.  I found myself on the swings, just enjoying the breeze, the sky, and the moments of carefree bliss....


Day 17 Prompt: A favorite photo of yourself and why.

Day 16: Difficulties

Sometimes, it seems like I've been dealt so many challenges in life, that getting out of bed is an effort that isn't necessarily worth it.  Thankfully, though, there are things in my life that *do* make getting out of bed worth it, no matter how hard it is at that moment!

I could pick any number of difficulties that I'm dealing with, as they're concurrent and continuous challenges in my world.  Instead, I'm going to let you into my biggest and most challenging difficulty.

My whole life has been spent catering to others, being who I think they want me to be, doing what I think they want me to do, doing what they actually want me to do, adjusting myself to fit in wherever it is that I am at the moment.  In some ways, that's an asset, as I can often adjust as need be.  But in most ways..... it sucks.  Because here I am, in my mid-thirties, and I have no idea who I am or what I like.  And this has been an incredible challenge as I try to navigate the world in which I live.  I have no idea what I like.  None.  I know I like cereal.  I know I like the color purple.  As far as who I am, I'm a teacher.  That's it. 

I have a lot to learn about myself, and what's making this uber challenging is that no one can tell me the answers to my questions because no one else is me.  My therapist's favorite line seems to be "what do you think?" which is often met with a blank stare and a sarcastic quip of sorts. 

Who am I?  What do I like?  Why are those questions so difficult?  If only I knew!

Day 16 Prompt: Something difficult about your "lot in life" and how you're working to overcome it.

Day 15: A Day in the Life

Day 15 Prompt: A Day in the life (include photos from throughout your typical day - this could be "a photo an hour" if you'd like.)

Day 14: Happiness

This prompt should be pretty easy, for once!  Ten things that make me happy.....

My favorite Albus Dumbledore quote....

1. the Pup
2. teaching
3. doing something new/fun on my computer
4. reading a good book
5. relaxing on a comfy swing or hammock
6. a clean house
7. hugs
8. smiles
9. a really good meal
10. chocolate

Day 14 Prompt: Ten things that make you really happy.

Day 13: A Public Apology

Dear World,

I want to apologize for my behavior when it comes to saying thank you.  More specifically, when it comes to writing thank you notes.

I suck at them.  I suck at them because I am so overwhelmed with gratitude upon receiving any gifts, that I am truly at a loss of words to appropriately express my appreciation for said gift - whatever it may be.  I push myself to attempt to write individual thank you notes to each person, and end up a mess of frustrating tears because it doesn't feel my words are able to convey my true appreciation.

It may sound like a lame excuse, but this began way back when I was a teen, and has been a life-long struggle.  I owe thank you notes for graduation presents, for housewarming gifts, and for gifts from students long ago received and still very much valued and appreciated.  Know that oftentimes, gifts sit unused for months, with the promise that I'll enjoy the gift once I've sent a thank you note.  And they sit, mocking me for months, until I finally crumble.

So if you've given me anything over the years, and you didn't get a formal thank you note, please know that I do so very, very much thank you for the gifts and the thoughts, and while I might never find the words to express my gratitude appropriately, my thanks is truly heartfelt.

Respectfully,
Violet

Day 13 Prompt: Issue a public apology. This can be as funny or as serious or as creative as you want it to be.