Be Nice

Challenge 6, Part 2: The Self

I found this quote to be very interesting.  It sounds so simple, kind of like rewording that golden rule.  But the way I look at it, it's actually quite complicated.  I want people to treat me nicely, with kindness and respect.  However, I have not quite fully learned how to speak up for myself, in regards to the fact that I avoid confrontation at all costs.  Meaning, if someone isn't treating me nicely and respectfully, I will just suck it up and take it.  I'll give them the benefit of the doubt, and chalk it up to them having a bad day, and me being the one who absorbs it.  Do you see any problems with that?  Cause for a long time, I sure didn't!  Now, though, after going through enough therapy and enough recovery, I see that there is an alternative - I don't need to suck it up and absorb it anymore.  I want to be treated respectfully and kindly, and if someone isn't doing so, I am working to give myself permission to walk away.  Tell them "You know what, this isn't working for me right now, let's try again later," and just walk away.  Easier said than done, but I'm trying!

Challenge 4, Part 5 - 7: Belief, Acceptance, Love

Self Belief.  Self Acceptance.  Self Love.

Mushing them all together for one final post for this week's topic.

I think they are actually rather well connected.  In order to have self love, you need to have self acceptance.  In order to have self acceptance, you need to have self belief.  Links in the chain of Self.  All the topics this week weave together a rather complex chain in which we build our lives upon - some more successfully than others, but all seven concepts are within each of us.  Sometimes they are buried rather deep, below layers of other self stuff (hatred, loathing, pity, etc) but they are still there.  It's our job to uncover them.  Yes, it can take a village, as no one should have to endure the process alone.  But I've been told it's a worth while journey to take, no matter how bumpy the road.

I'm taking baby steps, every few weeks, just a tiny bit closer to self love.  Along the way, of course, belief and acceptance hitch a ride, making the journey rocky and long.  But I'm finally starting to think that I might be worth it.  It's not been easy, accepting all that I've dealt with, knowing I can do nothing to change the past and make things better.  I can only accept what has happened, and believe that I am worth more than repeating the same patterns.  I have to find the belief somewhere, buried way deep inside, that I am worthy of love.  Cause no one deserves a life without love.  Not even me.