Nine simple words. A million complex feelings.
The hardest part is when you get an emotional punch in the stomach that knocks the wind out of you for a little while. While gasping for air, the overwhelming sense of longing weighs you down, pinning you to the spot until the moment(s) pass and you can breathe normally.
Often, for quite a while after, my heart aches. In those few moments, all I want is whoever it is I'm missing. Just for a few minutes... I know it won't fix things, but in that moment? It's all I want. Doesn't matter how many times I revisit old emails or notes or pictures or whatever. Sometimes that makes the ache worse, not better.
I guess the good news is that now I know what it's like to have people around you worth missing. I guess I didn't have that very often, so I never realized how painful it can feel to miss someone. Supposedly, this is a good thing. (Jury's still out.) Good or bad, I'm chalking it all up to another learning experience during this journey called life. I guess it's a good thing I like to learn...
(In case you don't get it the title, click here.)