Wednesday, December 4, 2013

Stuck on Repeat?

So I realize this, that the thoughts in my mind (which are mostly negative when it comes to myself) are tracks I allowed others to record in my brain.  Instead of releasing them, or not believing them, I've held on to them for so long, they feel like they're my own.  Like they are thoughts that I came up with, attacks on the self.

I know I didn't create them.  I didn't record them or plant them or even initially think or speak them.  What I did do was adopt them as my own.  Accept them as my own.  And allow them to play over and over and over.

I truly do hope that I will one day (soon?) reach the place where the old record plays it's tune, but I don't even pay attention it.  Even better?  I hope to toss that old record out the window, and instead, replace it with some kind tracks on a shiny new mp3.......


  1. Those voices in our heads - it can be so hard to tease apart what is "us" vs. what comes from outside that we've just gotten so used to rehearsing as true. I want to be in that place too and I believe we both can get there. We just need to choose our own songs (I say that as if it's easy to do - it's not!!). And yet I have hope.

    1. You bring up such a good point - the idea of our own voice vs. the outer voices from others that we've taken on as our own. I appreciate your hope. I think I might ride on that for a little while ;)


So? What do you think?