Saturday, October 26, 2013


It's been an interesting week.  Lots of things to think about.  Lots of questions.  Lots of answers to find.  Lots of thinking.  And yes, lots of tears.

On the flip side, there has been lots of learning, too.

Lots of questions......
  • Why do calories still dictate so much of my life?
  • Why is it socially acceptable to be on a diet, but not socially acceptable to talk about eating disorders?
  • Why does society promote things like Spanx and other body shapers?
  • Who made the decision that smaller and thinner is better?
  • Why isn't good health more important than size and shape?
  • Why does it matter how much I weigh, or what I look like?
  • Why do I care so much about what others think?
  • Why can't I accept my body as it is?
Lots of questions.......


  1. Those same questions haunt me too. I have to work really hard not to berate myself for still caring and still wanting there to be answers that make sense. I have to work even harder to accept that I may never have answers and yet still need to keep fighting to overcome the questions in the first place. Does that make sense? I am trying to say I think I understand and I'm on this journey with you... may we both prevail in time.

    1. It is so not a fun journey, eliminating the eating disordered behaviors from my life..... we shall both prevail, no matter how long it takes!!

  2. That quote .... I feel it in the very pit of my stomach on many occasions.

    And those questions - I don't know and I don't have the answers. All I know is that the answers will hopefully one day disappear, and that they won't matter to you either.

    Thinking of you and hoping you have a good week.

    1. The quote does the exact same thing to me..... and often I end up in tears longing for comfort that will never come. I like the idea of the the answers disappearing and not mattering.... good goal for which to strive!

  3. Sweet Purple Dreamer,

    These are very valid questions and perhaps the answers will come to you in time with more thinking and more questioning. It is never a weakness to realise that you don't yet have all the answers.

    Sending you much, much love and hugs on your journey xo

    1. Thank you for the love Kylie-Rose! I feel it all the way over here. I guess the good news is that questions lead to questions, and eventually, the questions will be on the positive path, I hope!

  4. I have been trying very hard to focus on my diet and exercise to bring down the important numbers in my life; my blood sugar and my weight. This means I am actively cutlivating the same obsession that you are trying so hard to overcome. Crazy, isn't it? I HATE it. I hate weighing myself, I hate watching and documenting every single thing I eat. I hate that 3 almost a month of dedicated effort I have lost 4lbs. Of course, my blood sugar is lower and more stable (that took a good 2 weeks to level out) so I am really trying to not let the slow weight loss knock me back. After all, this is just the first step to being healthy, which IS more important than the numbers or my reflection.

    1. I've been following your Wednesday posts, and find them inspiring! It just goes to show that one person's poison is another persons medicine! The ultimate goal of health is, as you said, more important than anything else :)


So? What do you think?