Wednesday, October 31, 2012

Professionally Developed

I work with some amazing people.  Professional, put together, masters of their craft.  People that I look at and think "wow, I kinda wish I could have their lives for a little while, and see how the other half lives......"  I often feel less than, just because they are all married (or engaged) and have families (or are just starting their families) and have very rich and wonderful lives outside of work.  In other words, their highlight reels are pretty spectacular.

And mine isn't.

Except for one area.  I found it quite shocking that my "highlight reel" actually brought out the behind-the-scenes struggle in my colleagues.  See, my highlight reel is very limited.  It actually only encompasses one skill area.  That's it.  I don't have the family.  I don't have the relationship.  I don't have the outside-of-work-amazing-life.  But I do have one talent, that I now know brings out insecurities in others.  Which is something I hate to do, make someone feel insecure.  And today, more than ever, that was made clear to me.

Which is why this quote came to mind.  I know I need to really work hard to stop looking at the highlight reel, the "public persona" of my colleagues.  Because when I do that, I feel like an ant surrounded by elephants - the smallest, most insignificant creature of the bunch.  Hopefully this new-found information will help me balance out a little bit more, and be less insecure about what they have that I don't, and instead, focus on sharing what I can......  After all, we all have something to offer, whether we're behind the camera or running the show.

Sunday, October 28, 2012

H.O.P.E.

I love this acronym for hope.  It is helpful in putting "right now" in perspective.

Because no matter what you're facing, good or bad, happy or sad, painful or not, it isn't permanent, no matter how much it feels that way in the moment.

Right now, in this moment......  Take a deep breath and know that the pain will end.  The moment will pass.  You will be ok.  Even if it doesn't feel that way right now.

Sometimes hope arrives in the most unexpected of ways.  We just have to be open to receive it. 

(Right now, for me, it comes in the form of typing this out for the world to read, and hoping that I can heed my own message, because I desperately need this reminder right now, too....)

Saturday, October 27, 2012

Week 40: Favorite TV Show

Yikes! This is going to be tough!  Kinda like picking characters that remind me of me, there are just too many choices! Not that I'm a big TV junkie, because I'm not. At least not anymore. I used to have the TV on whenever I was home, just for background noise. I usually kept it on Food Network. Now, I find the background noise to be a bit annoying, and I only watch a select few shows all together.

Dividing this up into current and past might make it a little simpler.

My current/recent favorite TV show is The Big Bang Theory. I can't help but laugh out loud as I watch! I DVR episodes just so I can watch them again and again. Really helps bring a smile to my face on a gloomy day! I am embarrassed to admit that I've probably seen every episode thus far. (Except this week's episode, still haven't watched it, but it's on DVR!)
My two favorite TV shows from the less-distant past are Friends and Gilmore Girls. And yes, I've seen every episode of both of them. I can quote both, too. And I never get tired of the reruns (though there are a few Friends episodes that I've seen so many times....) I wish I lived in a town like Stars Hollow, I loved the small feel of the place. Oh, and the banter between Lorelei and Rory didn't hurt, either.

As for overall most favorite shows?  These two three stem from my oh-so-distant childhood.  Kids Incorporated was a Disney Channel favorite and I loved watching it. I still remember every single word of the theme song, and can hear in my head at the slightest mention of Kids, Inc. (I may or may not have spent way too much money purchasing VHS tapes of the show on ebay.)  Nickelodeon hosted another favorite of mine, which recently came out on DVD, much to my surprise! Hey Dude was about as fake as they come, but I didn't care. I loved being at the Bar None ranch with Kyle and Brad and Mr. Ernst. My weekly escape to the summer vacation of my dreams. Finally, and likely my most favorite show of all time, Punky Brewster tops the list. I wanted her bedroom. I wanted her to be my best friend. I admired her optimism and spunk, despite the challenges she faced.

Ok, so I narrowed it down to six, not too bad considering the list spans 30 years!

Friday, October 26, 2012

Challenge 15: Image Inspiration

Images by Elena Kalis
I was finally stumped this week.  All week I've been looking at the images for this week's challenge, and every single time I found myself irritated and annoyed with the artist.  I went to the artist's website, Googled other images by the artist, and had the same reaction every single time.

This has led me to realize that there is still way too much going on behind the scenes of my brain (commonly referred to the unconscious) that I am not aware of.  However, I wanted to mark this challenge in the blog activity, because I hope that one day, I can come back to this challenge and view these same images through a different lens.  I hope that I can see them in a way that doesn't create the irritation that I see when I look at them now.  I try to keep an open mind in all areas of my life, but in this case, well, maybe another time.

Wednesday, October 24, 2012

Week 39: Favorite Time of Day

My favorite time of day is only a few minutes away, actually!  I'm almost embarrassed to admit it, but this blog is all about keeping things real.  Nothing but the honest, albeit painful, truth.

In a few minutes, I get to crawl into bed.  My bed, that is so comfortable and cozy.... I feel almost giddy thinking about how yummy it feels to crawl into bed, snuggle into the layers of blankets and sheets and pillows and softness.... I can't adequately describe it..... so let's see if this helps.

Let me try and give a clearer picture.  Have you ever bathed a dog, or seen a dog bathed? Picture that.  Picture the dog in the shower or tub.  Then picture the dog being freed of the water, and giving that whole-body shake that sends water flying everywhere.  Now, picture that same dog, finally let loose into the yard, and watch that dog roll around in the grass and dirt.  Imagine how happy they feel.  Now picture that huge sigh that the dog releases as they finally feel like themselves again.

That's how I feel crawling into my bed.

It's just me and my comfortable, soft, warm, welcoming bed.... I look forward to crawling into bed hours before I actually get to crawl in.  And when that moment finally arrives?  Yeah.  I sigh.

(Ironically, I never liked my bed as a kid!)

Tuesday, October 23, 2012

Our One Year Blog-a-versary!

Exactly year ago today I decided to jump into the blog-o-sphere.

This blog wouldn't have happened without the encouragement of a few special people.  I was stumped as to what to name my blog, since I wanted it to be kept anonymous, I couldn't use anything too obvious as a name.  It was then that a friend suggested playing around with my favorite color as the name.  Hence, My Purple Dreams was born.

Without the encouragement of another friend, I'd never have started the blog in the first place.  She invited me to join a small group of people working on ed recovery on Facebook.  The project started eight weeks prior to me joining, so I was a bit behind, but I didn't mind, and neither did she.  Thank you T & T, for your encouragement and support with this blog project!

In the past year, sooooo much has changed.  Some for the better, some changes are still in need of being made.  Along the way there were periods where posts were plentiful, other times, posts were sparse, but all the while, My Purple Dreams grew.  It is still growing, just as I am.  This blog has become such a powerful tool for me in every area of my life.  There is something very empowering about sharing my life with others - the ups and the downs - and being accepted and supported by my readers.

We're all traveling on our journeys, and I'm honored that you've chosen to be a part of mine for this past year, and hope that we'll continue to travel together for many more years to come!