NEDA Week: Secrets

Post Secret is a guilty pleasure of mine.  I wake up Sunday morning the first thing I do is check Sunday Secrets.  This week, in honor of National Eating Disorder Awareness Week, the secrets* are all on the topic of Eating Disorders.  I am not going to post any other postcards, as they may be disturbing or triggering.  I chose this one because it illustrates a key "element" of eating disorders: secrecy.

My eating disorder remained such a closely guarded secret for so long, I wasn't even aware I had one.  Once I realized that there was a chance I had an eating disorder, I still kept it secret from everyone, even my doctor.  It wasn't until I began working with my therapist that it couldn't be kept secret anymore.  And let me tell you, it was such a relief to have it out in the open.  Well..... out in the open with in my safe circle of trust, of course!  I am lucky.  I have an amazing support and treatment team that has helped me through the worst of things, and continue to help me on my path to recovery.

In the rest of the world, my eating disorder is still a secret.  I wish it wasn't.  I wish I had more people to talk to, more people that I trusted with this deep, dark, secret.  But I don't.  I trusted two very close friends when I first came clean with my eating disorder, and their reactions deterred me from telling others.  At this point, nearly 3 years after diagnosis, outside of my treatment team, only six people know my secret.  Makes it very hard to reach out for help.......

If you need help........ please reach out!  You can start right HERE.

*This link may only direct to eating disorder secrets until March 1st, at which point it may shift to whatever secrets are there.